My great big palm tree

Just a quick note about my palm tree. When I first got my yard I had this big mutha plonked smack dab in the center of the only bed

Messy. I know

 So why would a nice palm tree be a bad thing? Well underneath that thing are dense clumps of roots and I've read that some palms' roots eventually spread 25 feet away from the palm... horizontally. Aieee! This could potentially upset the block's structural integrity, not to mention veg grown underneath the palm is going to have to compete with its root system for nutrients, root space and water.

Soil sucker maybe but the cucumbers are finding a way, even if they are a 1/5 of the size of the others

Yet another problem is that watering and fertilizing the veg I grow underneath will hurt the palm (So I'm told) as it requires a special fertilizer and a specific watering regime. Geez. 

Do I keep it?

 

Well. There are three reasons I'm going to keep it

1. It provides shade for the entire bed, me and some containers in the summer months which are particularly vicious here in Malta.
2. I really don't like cutting down trees, that's years of growth there and to be honest I get sentimental. Call it anthropomorphizing (Like talking to a volleyball when shipwrecked) but hey; biologically a mature tree's functions have a certain character, they are complex organisms that have grown in their own specific way so I give them some respect. Plus they are bigger than me and that means they are better ;P
3. I don't have all the facts but I think the palm may aid the soil in some form or fashion... I would like to find out. I'm a scientist at heart.

So Yes. It stays.

How do I incorporate this beast into my plan?

 

To sum up my approach this is what I say to the palm 'Harden the ____ up palmtree!'

I wont be uprooting it because of my aforementioned respect however I'm pretty sure trees don't feel pain. They experience distress, but not pain. So...

1. I'm going to cut off all outgrowths from the sides of the base. No babies mr palm. 
2. I'm watering and fertilizing according to what is planted underneath it. I don't want the prettiest palm in the show I just want it to survive and be mostly healthy.
3. Over a number of sessions I'll be replacing the first foot of the bed with a different mix of soil. I will be cutting the roots around the palm to a depth of 1 foot and right up to the edges. I realise that this is endangering the tree but I will stagger the alterations with respect to that fact. It is my hope that this will not kill it but force it to rely on deeper roots which will not be touched and therefore be free to expand as needed.

So, the palm stays but it better be a fighter. To the palm I say 'May the odds be ever in your favour' 

Also that wasn't really a quick note was it?